When a loved one suffers from dementia and spends most of the time in a confused state, it
can be difficult to recall the person they used to be. Treating them as adults and honoring
their wishes including upholding their lifestyles will bring them a lot of reassurance and
comfort.

How do you maintain that sense of dignity?

Don’t talk down to them

It’s normal for things to take a parental tone if you are caring for a loved one’s daily
activities. If you are not careful, it will come out as disrespectful. You should try as much as
possible to speak to them as an equal.

Ask leading questions

In order to ensure that your loved one enjoys conversational success, try replacing openended
questions with leading questions that are easier to answer. For instance, say something
like “Dad, tell us how you enjoyed hunting while growing up in Kansas” instead of “Dad,
what did you do for fun while growing up?”

Therapeutic fibbing

This is a concept for relieving the guilt that is often associated with lying to your loved one.
That lie might just be the best thing that you ever said to them. Telling the truth in some
situations might cause unnecessary pain and confusion when the person is already
experiencing difficulty with emotional control and rational thoughts.

If your loved one wants to drive, tell them that you will drive them since you wanted to go
out anyway. Telling them that it is dangerous for them to drive, will certainly upset them.

Plan outings

With proper planning, you can have successful outings. Consider factors such as:
• Food Choice: Does your destination spot have foods that are easy to eat?
• Distance: How far do you have to go?
• When do they tend to have the best moods?

Prepare your loved one in advance. However, some will not even remember. It is best to use
your judgment about what they can handle.

Prepare others for the special needs of your loved ones. You may want to speak to a
restaurant manager in advance. Note down some things you would like to be done when you
are seated and hand it to the host.

Relax and enjoy the outing. If you are anxious, this will automatically pat off onto the loved
ones. An effect of dementia is making people get affected by the emotions of those around
them. Remaining calm will provide you with an opportunity to enjoy yourself.