It is common to hear that an aging parent has declined completely the help of their children.
Most of them are used to having it their way and having total control. Their systems may be
working inefficiently but still, they will apply all efforts to block help from their offspring.
Most adult children tread softly on issues around their aged parents dignity. They may stick
here until the parents come to the realization that they have truly aged. Nevertheless, they
may act when an accident has happened and led to some unfortunate scene such as a broken
hip.
It is good to hope for the first scenario.
When the adult child pushes too hard, the aged parent is likely to react by pushing back
harder. Are you in a similar situation? You might want to try the suggestions below.
1. Stress on Giving That is Characterized by Receiving
When aging parents welcome their grown children as their caregivers, they are stating that
they want to give them a free chance to grow and learn. On the other hand, aging parents that
decline help are simply denying their sons and daughters the learning experience they
deserve. If you find yourself in such a situation, try reminding your parent that he took care
of his own parents and all he felt afterwards, was a lot of pride.
2. Stress on the Empowering Kind of Receiving
It is important that you demonstrate that you are on their side and are fully aware that they
would like to be left alone. Add that, with your help, they could achieve more while still
maintaining their self-sustenance.
3. Role Model Reminder
While they were youngsters, adult children learned from observing their parents go about
handling prime life challenges. You could try indicating to your parent that you have set your
attention on them and that if they were to show just a little acceptance, it would be a gracious
gesture to you. All this is happening in the face of cognitive and physical decline.
Caregiving power fights are annoying and can lead to harm in the general quality of any
child-parent relationship. Most times the situation tends to take the style that, it is the
caregiver that is the enemy, and not old age.
If it happens that they continue to block all efforts, you will have to learn that old age should
not be adapted to but fought against.
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